Yet Again

Love is a feeling made of complex emotions. Lust, caring, romance, and intimacy all play a major role in the state known as being "in love". It is part need, part want, and part uncertainty.

Another relationship down the drain. How is it I always find myself in these situations? It seems I continue not to only ruin relationships, but friendships as well. Sometimes, I wonder if I will ever be capable of loving someone genuinely before it's to late and I loose them forever.

My last attempt at commitment ended horribly and the month following it I found myself lonelier than ever. In many ways I am a creature of comfort and after having a person by my side, almost attached at the hip, it felt so different being alone. Even when I had people around me, I still felt like a piece of me was missing.

I guess it was unfair of me to jump into the relationship with **********. I knew I wasn't ready for another monogomous relationship. There were so many things going on with me emotionally that the security of having someone to call mine was comforting. The idea that she could easily get over me and find someone else urged me to do the same.

Some may say it's selfish but I really did believe that with enough time I would learn to love him. I'm not sad that the relationship is over, but I do feel horrible, because yet again I have a ruined another friendship. I think it's time I stop dating friends. Some lines are better left uncrossed.